Sherilyn and I are long-time friends. We knew each other from primary school and grew up together since we were 10. She is one of my closest friends and we had been through many stages of life together. Through the highs and lows, 15 years later, she has become somebody I highly respect and admire for the way she loves and protects people. We have a little nickname for each other since we were 15, "fammeh" that was derived from "family".
Photographed and interviewed by Audris Adabella
Hi Fam! Please tell everybody a little bit about yourself.
S: Hello everybody! My name is Sherilyn, you can call me Shers or Sher. I turned 25 recently in June and am a Financial Consultant with Prudential. I am also pursuing a Bachelor’s in Business Management and am currently in my final year at UOL. (Phew..finally!)
Not sure if age is catching up- but these days I like to spend the afternoons enjoying a cuppa by myself in the cafes or just taking strolls with my boyfriend. That sums up how I’d typically spend a day off!
That sounds like a lot of commitment to different things! How do you juggle your time and energy with work, school, freelance gigs, family, friends, being in a relationship and so much more?
S: I’d say its a process that I am still learning from. At the start of my career, it was very overwhelming. It truly was. I’ve lost people, but I've also gained people. Over the years, I became better at managing everything that’s going on in my life (although there can always be room for improvement). So, I will say that I am still learning!
I have a very supportive family, especially my parents. My partner believes in me (sometimes even more than I believe in myself) and that really helps set everything in place. To me, it is all about prioritizing and intentionally setting time aside for the people who cannot be compromised. I believe in consistent efforts in the relationships that we hold closest to our hearts. That is why Sundays are my favorite days because I spend them mostly with my family; at church service in the morning, then with my boyfriend's later in the day!
Sherilyn is wearing the dignity top in raw linen, XXS/XS
It's the closest people that makes us, right? Do you think you have changed in the past 3-5 years?
S: Most definitely, and I’m glad I did. Looking back, I wasn’t the best anyone-could-have-asked for to the people around. For everything that’s refined me into who and what I am today- I credit it to the love and grace of Christ. Of course, I am not the best, but I try my best to become better every day, all for the people who matter.
How will you describe your #adulting journey in the last few years?
S: It was a tapestry of ups and downs. For real, the classrooms didn’t teach us how to become an adult but life did. We’ve made silly mistakes we wished we didn’t. As we grow up and older, our parents grow weaker with age.
Inherently, we assume new responsibilities and I am sure people around my age can relate. Our actions now have more consequences. We start to have a more macro view of the decisions we partake. In the course of it, there were tears shed, relationships lost, but of course, there were the mini victories and the new friendships forged. Everything that’s occurred –I embrace them as a part of the Sherilyn I have become today.
One thing for sure, in the course of “adulting”, I realized that I needed God more than ever. To summarise, this “adulting” process is ongoing. Life doesn’t get easier but my heart is governed by this peace from God and that has helped to refine me and keep me growing to the person I am today, and the days to come! Every day is a new beginning to try again!
I know you to be someone who goes all out for the people you care about and love. Even more so in this difficult time of COVID-19. What keeps you going?
S: Thank you for your kind words, fammeh. I think living in a time such as this, I realized that (unlike myself) not everybody has the privilege of being cooped at home with the people they are comfortable with.
Not every house is a home.
This time exposes the toll taken on a lot of people’s mental capacity, and it’s hitting even the younger ones these days; because they reel their emotions in, sweep them under the carpet and by the time it is exposed- they’ve already bottled quite a bit on their end. My heart truly breaks, but I am humbled and most honoured to be able to lend an ear and where possible practical help to people battling such issues.
What keeps me going is in the simple revelation and understanding (since knowing Christ) that my identity is found in Him and not of the world. I am more than happy to share this truth with anyone who feels like all hope is lost. Sometimes, we just need to be kinder to the world because we don’t know what the other person is going through.
This serves as a pushing factor forward and is simply what keeps me going. I have a verse as my lock screen on my working iPad “Let all that you do, be done in love”. It is from 1 Corinthians 16:14.
You are truly a beacon of light to the brokenness around. Fam, your job requires you to be available and to have a huge emotional capacity. Does it get tiring?
S: Sure, it does get tiring. The learning curve here is steep because we deal with humans. I think humans are the most beautiful yet the most difficult kind of medium to deal with. Many times I wanted to throw the towel in.
Overcoming these whirlwinds of emotions looked like this:
- Remembering how everything was put together for the Greater Good. I believe that every person I meet here isn’t by coincidence and I am always intentional to take it deeper.
- To be raw with my emotions. So I always take it to God-the good and the not so good, because my Maker knows me best. That helps for me because when we are clear of our purpose in life, everything that is in alignment with the aforementioned becomes worth it to do-whether or not if it hurts.
- I think genuineness and sincerity are key in setting the tone for every relationship I set to embark on, in my line of work. This is what I always look out for. With that, I wouldn’t say I chase the dollar, but I chase their hearts. The closing sale is a by-product.
Finally, I am also blessed with a very strong support system that I could share my heart with. Naturally, I was made more expressive, so I communicate the way I feel to the people I really trust. Mostly, my boyfriend and my parents. They keep me grounded and they serve as my life’s cheerleaders and strong pillars of support to remind me of why I even invested my heart in this in the first place.
What helps you with productivity and keeping organized?
S: What helps me with productivity is the purpose. Why do I do what I do? Once that is properly established, there is more meaning in our actions because it is anchored in our purpose. I also believe in frequent check-ins on the heart; conducted by myself (through self-reflections) as well as the people I trust. I believe in the hard work, but I believe more so in heart-work. All our actions stem from the heart, so I am wary to always guard my heart and conduct frequent check-ins.
To keep organized- discipline is extremely important. A trait that I am still working on, little by little!
Pro-tip on time management?
S: Just got to prioritize, plan and then execute. There is no such thing as no time, it is really about making time for it.
Share with us the top 3 things you value in life.
S: God, people, and my loved ones.
How did you feel turning 25?
S: I was truly very touched by all love that day!
Turning 25 felt.. normal. I didn’t feel like it was a big hoo-ha or how they termed it as the “quarter-life crisis”, none of that. In fact, I’m excited for what’s to come!
With every passing birthday, the understanding of the temporality of life sinks in deeper; it becomes even more apparent to never get too caught up in these fleeting moments but to fix our gaze on to what’s eternal, that being said -in these moments, it is important to appreciate, to slow down and celebrate the people we love.
What will be a piece of advice you would give to young Sherilyn?
S: You never had to conform to the world’s standards, or what the world said about success. Your identity is found in The One who made you, so stay gold, stay true, stay you.
So much gold in this conversation with you! Thank you for sharing your heart with us. Always cheering you on, fammeh!
